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Triumph

Sometimes it’s the little victories that bring us the most joy. For me, one of the biggest such triumphs is knocking out a title from my “to-read” list. I’ve finally gotten it under control recently, though one of my coworkers at the library has described making progress on a reading list as a feat akin to slaying a hydra…

No, not the kind from “Captain America”

In my line of work, I’m generally adding a new book to my to-read list every other day. After a staff meeting a few weeks ago where one of my coworkers introduced us to the concept of the reading map via this example she created, I knew that I had to add yet another. You see, this reading map introduced me to Erin Morgenstern and her debut novel, The Night Circus. I was absolutely blown away by the book, which is a strange and fantastic combination of the magic competition presented in The Prestige and the environment presented in Something Wicked This Way Comes. Morgenstern weaves a tale of intrigue and romance as two young illusionists compete in a game with a mysterious circus serving as the venue. Celia and Marco are bound to the game by their masters, neither of them fully aware of the rules, including the fact that only one of them can survive. The Night Circus is a series of complex rings, much like the black and white striped tents that make up the titular location. I couldn’t put it down. Finishing it is one of those little victories. I can’t recommend it enough.

Next up on the reading list is another debut novel, A Once Crowded Sky. See you soon.

Librarian

Since my physical dictionary is still in a cardboard box somewhere (ugh), I’ll have to resort to web sources for this one. Dictionary.com defines a librarian as “a person trained in library science and engaged in library service.” At this point in my life, the term does not directly apply to me. I’m a library clerk, merely a person engaged in library service. The training is still severely lacking, and there’s this piece of paper with a few words on it, like master, library, science, and my name that is still at least two years away. I’m not a librarian. Not yet. It’s a goal, though, and it’s one that I’ve grown more and more serious about in the last few years. One of my coworkers has described it as catching the “library bug” and wanting to get more involved.

My background is filled with books. My parents both read to me and my sisters while we were getting ready for bed. As I was growing up, I would frequently visit the local public library, a site that still plays into a great deal of my writing. We would have story time there, and my sisters and friends and I would always participate in the summer reading program. There was a small local bookstore owned by a couple (quite literally, as they were married at the time) of the teachers that we’d visit on occasion. When they decided that they didn’t want to run it anymore, my parents stepped in and bought it so that there would still be a bookstore in town. After that, the bookstore was my after-school hangout of choice, though I would still stop by the library on the way there. I couldn’t get enough books. I devoured everything that came into my reach.

That’s one of the few things about me that hasn’t changed as I’ve grown older. I love books, and I want to be around them whenever possible. That’s what drew me to work in libraries and bookstores. It’s why I interned for a literary agency, and it’s why I started this blog. I read because I want to read, and I write because I want to write. It’s been said that one should write the book they want to read. That’s very true. I’m going to bathe my life in ink and clothe it in parchment.

I’m going to become a librarian. There’s no doubt of that in my mind. Right now, I just need to be able to support myself and get signed up for the GRE. I’m not looking forward to the test itself, or to the couple of years of grad school that the advanced degree will require, but I am looking forward to finding a way to maintain libraries into the future. I want the world to be a safe place for readers and writers alike, and I want them to know that their work will always have some refuge. Besides, for a writer, what better day job could there be?

Freshly Pressed Versus Oppressed

For those of you who don’t know, I work in a public library. Those of you who do know me should be aware that I have taken a strong stance against censorship in all forms, especially in the last few years, but it started long ago, back when I first discovered Banned Books Week. Even as a young child, I was a voracious reader, having completed my own trips through The Chronicles of Narnia and The Hobbit & The Lord of the Rings by the time I started second grade. I wanted to read everything that I could get my hands on, and I couldn’t understand why it was that some people would try to keep other people from reading anything.

The process of banning books is a lengthy one. Books are challenged all the time, by parents and religious groups and teachers. Librarians don’t sift through the books they’re acquiring to determine whether or not they should go on the shelves. Librarians (and libraries) promote the ability of the patron to access any information the patron may seek, regardless of personal opinion. Personal opinion should never EVER come into play when determining what works should be available to the public. “When filling their shelves, librarians do not judge the content of books on whether it would be suitable for all audiences. As public institutions, libraries may not discriminate on disseminating information on the basis of age, sex or race, which means that people can check out whatever materials they choose. That said, libraries request that parents and guardians of minors monitor their selections.” -Cristen Conger, How Stuff Works

People come up with all manner of excuses for why they want to ban certain books. This one has violence in it. That one has sex in it. There’s offensive language here. There’s racial insensitivity there. In many cases from my personal experience, however, the people who are attempting to ban a book have not read it for themselves. They have merely taken negative hype surrounding a book and made their opinion solely based on the opinions of others. Yay, sheeple!

Earlier this week, I was at work when a library patron came in, returning a book on playaway that he claimed was “pornography” and demanding that we start the ball rolling to get the book banned from our library. The title in question? Crooked Little Vein by Warren Ellis. Ever read anything by Warren Ellis? This is the guy who created Transmetropolitan, the story of journalist Spider Jersualem, whose character is heavily inspired by the real life of Hunter S. Thompson and who uses a bowel disruptor gun as his weapon of choice. Crooked Little Vein is unabashedly intense. Reading the blurb on the case could have told him that. Thirty seconds on the internet could have told this patron that.

From wikipedia: “Michael McGill, a burned-out private eye is hired by a corrupt White House Chief of Staff to find a second “secret” United States Constitution, which had been lost in a whorehouse by Richard Nixon. What follows is a scavenger hunt across America, exposing its seedier side along the way. McGill is joined by surreal college student side-kick, Trix, who is writing a thesis on sexual fetishes. McGill has to deal with strange events sometimes unrelated to his adventures – he describes himself as a ‘shit-magnet’, with weird phenomena following him wherever he goes…About.com reviewer Jonathan Lasser called Crooked Little Vein “an ace put-up job” and that it was “evidence that freedom is more valuable than repression”. Whitney Pastorek, reviewing for Entertainment Weekly takes pains to note that the work “is not for the faint of heart”, and that Ellis has “got a bright future outside of the picture books”. 

I don’t even know that this patron finished the book. My honest guess? He got too upset because something in the book disagreed with his narrow world view and shut it off. Ignorance is not bliss, people. Ignorance is ignorance, plain and simple. We have to move to the point of object permanence. Hell, two-year-olds understand that covering her eyes doesn’t make mommy disappear. We’ve got way too many heads and not enough sand for this crap to work. Acknowledge that there might be something out there that you don’t agree with, and that it’s not going to go away.

I’m tired of people blaming writers for things that they don’t like. I’m tired of people taking offense at libraries for providing freedom of access to material. Book banning and challenging is a form of oppression of the people. We need to open our eyes, and face the future with courage. Stop book banning. Stop ignorance. Embrace knowledge. Visit your local library and tell them how much you appreciate what they do for you. I’m going to go read Warren Ellis.

Freshly Pressed Versus Depressed

Can blogging help you overcome your depression?

I feel that the answer is, at least in my case, a resounding yes.

See, depression can be genetic. I was terrified when I learned this, because I knew that my father had, at least in his past, dealt with some pretty severe issues of depression. We even discussed it briefly during our recent trip together. Well, this week, I’ve been dealing with it a lot myself, and I’m not entirely sure why. It’s more than a little disconcerting to see symptoms and trends in behavior and mood and know exactly what it’s building up to, so I decided that I needed to talk things out a little bit.

I like to do one of two things when I’m feeling low. Thing one, naturally, is reading. Escapism at its best, I know, right? Google it. There’s tons of articles and actual research papers about people using fantasy to avoid the stresses of the real world. Alternatively, I play video games or watch movies, but the end goal is still the same. I get into a world that’s not the normal one I’m stuck in, and I feel a little better for a while. The second thing that I do when the depression hits is attempt to write. It might be a page or two on one of the numerous short stories or novels that are floating around in my head. It might be a shitty poem (or even the occasional good one!). Over the last year, I’ve been sharing my writing with more people than I ever really expected to, thanks to this blog. My wordpress page has helped me get in touch with numerous people who do what I want to do: write. I’m incredibly grateful, because nothing breaks me out of a really low day like hearing from someone who has gone through the same things that I’m going through. Maybe it’s not the blogging itself, but the social aspect that makes this all feel so therapeutic.

I may only have twenty-some-odd viewers each day (if I’m lucky), but you know something? You folks help me more than you could ever guess. Thank you, dear readers. Thank you very much.

The Sun Also Rises

I’m rereading Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises today, and I blame Woody Allen. Actually, I blame Corey Stoll and his incredible performance as Ernest Hemingway in Allen’s latest film, which won the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay. Stoll’s performance was only one of the many constant bright points in the film, but it was this moment that really won me over. I knew then that I was going to have to return to one of my favorite books of all time. It’s quite the change of pace from the other story that I’ve been reading lately, and it’s always good to return to familiar territory.

When I was in college, I read Hemingway for the first time. I had read his work before, when I was in high school, but that was before I truly read Hemingway. Now I feel as though I am reading some of my favorite works for the first time, and so it is that The Sun Also Rises has made its way back into my hands. It feels right to be reading classic literature. I’m not trying to be a book snob or anything, because I’ll read pretty much anything and give any author a chance at least once, but it’s good to come back to perennial favorites. There is something almost indescribable about Hemingway’s storytelling that pulls you in. If you haven’t read it yet, I highly recommend you do so. He’s really not that intimidating of an author. Personally, I feel that he’s the easiest of the Lost Generation to really understand.

On the other side of the reading coin, there is the Lovecraft collection that I’ve been borrowing from a friend. Now, I own a copy of the Necronomicon, quite possibly the most thorough (and best titled) collection of H.P. Lovecraft’s work ever published, but it’s sadly hidden away in a storage unit for now. Despite the presence of perhaps only a third of the more well-known titles that exist within the pages of the Necronomicon, this collection does a phenomenal job of presenting some of the best work (albeit the shorter pieces) that he ever wrote, including “The Call of Cthulhu” and “The Shadow Over Innsmouth” within its pages. I read the former story while on an airplane over the Pacific Ocean, and I think that the only better way to experience it would be to read it on a ship in the Atlantic. You can’t beat reading a story where it takes place. This reminds me, I’m working on a piece at the moment that is set in a building not unlike my hometown library, with a few creative twists. I’ve never been in a building that is more suited for a horror story. I’m drawing on influences of Poe, Lovecraft, and King, masters of the genre, and injecting just a little bit of truth. We’ll see how it turns out.

 

Let It Snow!

Winter has come to Westeros. I’m done with A Dance With Dragons. Now it’s time to work on some short fiction pieces that I’ve been playing around with in my head for the last couple of months, and move on to more books. Any recommendations? I’ve tried using this, but it’s only so-so when you read so much… Next up on my list are some of the following:

Inkdeath by Cornelia Funke (finishing the trilogy at last)

Brisingr and Inheritance by Christopher Paolini (see above)

The Black Company by Glen Cook

Shadow & Claw by Gene Wolfe (halfway done)

11/22/63 by Stephen King

Lord of the Flies by William Golding (rereading)

1984 by George Orwell (rereading)

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury (rereading)

The Shining by Stephen King (rereading in advance of the release of the sequel, Dr. Sleep)

A Wizard of Earthsea by Ursula Le Guin

Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson

The Aleph and Other Stories by Jorge Luis Borges

There’s also this. It’s a new book called White Dove, and if the author’s name seems familiar, there’s a very good reason for that. It’s written by my fifteen year old cousin. I’m damn proud of her, albeit a little jealous that she got published before me. 😀

Winter has come to Colorado too. We’re finally getting some snow that’s staying on the ground for more than a few hours! This is kind of a big deal, people.

In winter, Colorado is basically Hoth

It doesn’t really actually mean all that much to me right now. I’m off of work for the next few days, unless I get called in to substitute for someone. In the meantime, I really should be looking for additional work, but there are so many things that demand for me to read them…seriously, it’s like an addiction. I can’t stop reading! That, and drinking Mountain Dew. And hopefully writing… Speaking of which, writing, that is, not Mountain Dew (though I realized the store had ten different varieties of Mountain Dew the other day, twelve if you counted the two diet flavors…), I found something that could come in very handy. If nothing else, I can use this for when I get into an argument with some gorbellied, motley-minded clack-dish:

For a more sophisticated way of saying "Your mother's a whore."

Goodnight!

Good Morning!

Yes, it’s nearly 6 AM. Yes, I’ve been primarily subsisting on caffeine and alcohol today. How is this different from any other day? I’m at that perfect balance of booze-induced exhaustion and caffeine-induced insomnia that means that I’m ready to write. Here’s some updates, dear readers.

1.) NaNoWriMo. I tried and died this year, but I managed to get upwards of 30,000 words in the first three weeks of the project. I’m pretty damn proud of myself. I’ve proven to myself that I’m actually capable of sitting down and putting something cohesive and coherent together, outside of this blog. I’m quite pleased. In addition to said pride, I’ve gotten a damn good start on my first big writing project. The 30,000 words I wrote last month will serve as a springboard for me. I’m definitely going to try NaNo again next year. I don’t know if I’ll ever finish anything within the thirty day time frame, but I will find ideas and hope there. The motivation it provided was a much needed kick start. Thank you to everyone who supported me during November. I’ll keep trying. Arsus and Rime and the others are far too deeply buried inside my brain to let them go completely.

2.) The job hunt continues. Naturally. I’ve decided to try to branch out a little bit, and start applying for some jobs in Denver and the surrounding area as well. I would hate to leave the Springs, but at the same time, it’s hard  to limit myself when I know that there could be better possibilities elsewhere. I’m not planning to leave town any time soon, though. I would find it very hard to leave all of my friends behind (and, by the way, I feel closer to most of the people that I met in college than to any of the people I knew from preschool through senior year of high school, and I’m not sure if this is weird or not). I’m not trying to be picky about jobs. Especially not after reading this earlier today (or was it late yesterday?). Speaking of cracked.com, I’m considering applying as a writer there. Supposedly, if you can write comedy, you can write anything. I don’t know if this is true or not, but I guess I’ll never know until I try. I’m sort of connected to a writing/editing/reading job now, but at the moment, it’s pro-bono, so it’s strictly for experience. It’s hard to remain focused on a job like that when it’s web-based and not paying off immediately. I’d say that’s a pretty rough choice for someone in a writing field, because it’s difficult enough trying to get a job that’s not just a crappy retail or customer service gig. Been there, done/doing that. I don’t know that I can justify NOT doing it, though, given my financial outlook at the moment. Conundrum? Maybe, but probably not in the long run.

3.) Christmas is coming. I love Christmas. It’s not my favorite holiday ever, but it’s still a pretty darn good one. I’m still not certain exactly what I’ll be doing in three weeks, but I’ll be with people who care about me, no matter what, and I hope that all of you are able to do the same. It’s a good time of year to be around family. I have a tendency to think that I’m going to be miserable when I go home, even though it’s rarely actually true. I can put up with my mother being upset that my hair is still long, and my ears are still pierced, and I’m not nearly as religious as I was ten years ago. I enjoy being around my relatives, but I’m also grateful that I don’t live in my hometown anymore. For the most part, it’s your typical small rural town full of small-minded people. Yes, that’s kind of an unfair blanket statement. There are plenty of people there who are more open-minded than others, but they’re few and far between in a town that boasts so many churches per-capita that I could attend a different one each month for a year and still not have completed the rounds. So naturally, I moved to Colorado Springs, right? Hahaha. Oh, local humor, how you amuse me in the early hours of the morning. I digress. I still like to see my family, and I know that they like to see me, and that my visits are far too infrequent and too short as far as they’re concerned. I’m happy with this. It’s best not to disillusion them just yet. 😀

4.) Aspirations are still at an all-time high. I’m optimistic. I’ve sent a short story in to another magazine, and I’m trying to write a couple more. The next one will probably weigh in a bit heftier than the one I’m showing people now, but we’ll see what happens. When inspiration strikes, you have to use it. I found this yesterday, and had to share it with you.

Seriously. That thing is awesome. That’s outside the main public library in Cincinnati. Who would have ever thought that I would have reason to go to Ohio? I guess I do now. I would love to see this thing in person. I’m fairly certain that the photos do not do it justice. I could spend the rest of my life wandering around old bookstores and libraries.

I’ve found some other awesome stuff as well. Like vintage clothing? Love old books as much as I do? Check out Out of Print Clothing. These people make some of the most amazing shirts I’ve ever seen, decorated with classic literary covers. And for those of you who like to read other people’s writing on other people’s books, check this out.

I think that just about wraps things up for now. I need to try to catch a few hours of sleep so that I can play more Zelda tonight, or finish A Dance With Dragons in the next day or so. Martin’s writing is still just as strong in this book, and I can’t wait to see how it wraps up and leaves things for The Winds of Winter. Here’s to hoping that we don’t have to wait six years. Peace!

Red Barchetta, Black Beretta

I’m doing well enough. Better than my girlfriend, I’m afraid. She’s had a rough week of work, as her latest post will tell you. As for me, I’m behind on NaNo again, but I’ve got time today and tomorrow to catch up. I’ve got some pre-fabricated bits of story that I’m going to be able to drop in, so for those of you who’d like to get a taste of what’s to come, check out The Tale of the Sun and Moons Part I and II. The bonus of that is that it’s nearly 1,000 words in rough draft form that I can use to supplement whatever I get around to writing today. Good thing I have Rush to listen to.

I’m sore as hell. My arms are pretty toasted from yesterday. I had the opportunity to fire a handgun for the first time. Now I grew up in a small farming community, so I’m no stranger to firearms and general safety requirements for them. I first learned to shoot with a .22 Winchester, alongside my sisters, under the watchful eye of my father. Several years later, I learned how to handle a 12 gauge pump action shotgun, and eventually a 10 gauge bolt action shotgun built for hunting geese. This was a completely different world. I was using a 9mm Beretta, and it was incredible. I’m not the best shot in the world, and I’ll fully admit that right now. Using the .22 would have been another story altogether, but it was my first time ever using a gun that I could operate with one hand. I’ll get better with practice. At least I hit the target. 😀 I don’t own a gun of my own, and I would love to be able to avoid using one in self defense, but it’s nice to know that I could handle the kick and whatnot of something like that.

It’s difficult to maintain my writing level for NaNoWriMo when Westeros keeps calling me back. I’m now about halfway through the 4th book of George R.R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire, A Feast for Crows. I want to keep reading until the end, but I know that it’s going to be a while before we see the 6th book, and I’m closing in fast on A Dance With Dragons. I know I’ve said it before, but seriously, this series is the best fantasy I’ve read in years. Words cannot describe how much I love these books. I’m not one who is often at a loss for words. I hope that I can come close in terms of the man’s ability to build characters that you’ll grow fond of and learn to understand. Honestly, even his villains get to be sympathetic at times. It’s crazy brilliant.

There may actually be something happening on the job side of things. I may be a step closer to Goal #1. My current job is 19 hours a week. This means, due to the joy that is human resources, I do not qualify for benefits. Not at all. I would need to work one more regularly scheduled hour/week to get that. That’s just the way things go, and most of the people who have worked or are working less than 20 hours/week are not pleased with it. However, one of my coworkers is currently employed 24 hours per week. She’s also around eight months pregnant, and will be leaving us shortly. It wouldn’t be ideal, but her position would be open, and I’d be able to apply, and it would be far better than where I am now. Additionally, another coworker was interviewing today for a position at another branch. If she gets this job, I’ll be applying for her 40/week position. *fingers crossed*

Last but certainly not least for the day, is this. I’m a huge fan of R.E.M. Additionally, I’m a big fan of Stephen Colbert. Today, I found something that I didn’t expect, considering that the band recently decided to break up. This. Anyway, I really should get going. I’ve got pumpkins to slice up in preparation for holiday baking, and a lot of words to crank out to catch back up for NaNoWriMo. Good luck, everyone.

Countdown

It’s nearly Halloween, which means a few different things. First, it’s the time of year to start watching one of my favorite movies of all time as I gear up for my favorite holiday. I love Halloween. There’s something incredible about a holiday where perfectly responsible young adults can put on crazy costumes and wander the streets in search of candy. Barring that, there’s always barricading oneself in the house with a good supply of booze and hand out candy to the younger ones. Speaking of booze, I finally got to try Left Hand Brewing Co.’s Milk Stout Nitro. Well done, folks. That one’s a winner.

Second, the impending end of October means that it’s nearly November. It’s time to wrap up a couple of projects before National Novel Writing Month officially kicks off. I’d love to be able to use NaNoWriMo to put a coherent draft of my book together. I’m in the process of collecting my notes. I’ve got a couple of moleskines full of them right now.

Third, it means it’s a perfect time to be reading this:

Hellboy by Mike Mignola. Cover of Volume Ten, The Crooked Man and Others

It's always a good time for Mike Mignola.

I’ve been working my way through the Hellboy comics, finally. It only took me, oh, seven years after seeing the first movie. Now, thanks to the sheer awesomeness that is the public library system, I’m holding the first ten collected volumes of Mike Mignola’s greatest bit of genius. Those of you who have not read them (or at least seen the movies) are missing out. Mignola blends classic myths from around the world with his own, unique characters. The adventures of the members of the Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defense are not to be ignored.

Anyway, I’ve got another job interview and two more applications to turn in, even though the thought of another Christmas in retail terrifies me. I’m still keeping my fingers crossed. I had an interview on Friday at one of the smaller library branches in town, and it would be better pay/more hours than I currently have. Good luck with your ventures, dear readers.

Day 1: Part 2

And back to the blog.

Here I am again. After managing to somehow survive work today, despite a crazy man who claimed that I stole the $5 change I was supposed to have given him (a quick count of the cash register proved him wrong, thankfully), I am back at home. It’s nice to be able to come home to the apartment after a long day and finally get some dinner and a drink or two.

I’ve been spending a good deal of time thinking about this story I’m writing. I kind of wish I had more of it planned out in advance, but at the same time, I like to think that my first journey into this world will be far more similar to that of my future readers. Ideally, this means that I will be able to keep things from becoming too overwhelming/confusing for anyone other than myself. I want people to know how it felt as I was creating this world. I want it to feel lived in and rugged, but inviting to people who’ve never experienced anything quite like it (ideally, this will be all of my readers).

I hate when I read a novel and get overwhelmed with crap. I like something I’m reading to be accessible with a minimal level of extra effort required, especially if it’s the start of a series. If it’s a writer I’ve read before, there will be some level of tolerance. If it’s something that I already know, again, there will be tolerance. After all, “A Clockwork Orange” is still one of the best things I’ve ever read, despite the crazy dialogue and narration that goes along with the story of Alex and his droogs. I don’t, however, tolerate this kind of writing when it’s done pretentiously. If someone takes the trouble to create a language, they should make it useful, not just throw it in your face to say “OOOOO, look what I came up with!” Everything should have a purpose. Don’t give throwaway details. Make people question the intent of every line of dialogue, every description of every lamp and every passing dog. Create a visual that your reader can not forget. Forge something truly memorable. That’s my goal. I want to give my readers text that they desire. I want them coming back to my book every couple of years after they first read it and have them find something that they didn’t notice the time before.

At any rate, it’s time to write something before I fall asleep. As conviction becomes content, I shall post more.